Spiritual Warfare

So...um...yeeeeaaaaahhhhh.....

That's what is up.  Spiritual Warfare.

 I know it happens.  I know Satan delights in the doubts and nasties of us.  But I guess I have never really felt it.  Like hardcore.  And I mean, I guess I should have.  There has been plenty of times in my life when I have doubted God.  Lots of instances when I wanted to, and probably did, look to the sky and say "WHERE ARE YOU? WHY AM I HERE IN THIS PLACE?"  But right now things are different.

Satan is attacking me where it hurts.  Like REALLY bad.  And I do apologize for the vagueness in this.  Maybe in a few months I might be able to be more transparent, but for now I need to hide in vague. 

But yeah, Satan is using his attractiveness and wit to whisper in my ear.  He is caressing my innermost secrets.  He is agreeing with my most hated insecurities.  And he is laughing.  He is laughing at the twisted tangled mess I am making of it.  He is EATING it up.  I feel like I am a great movie or dramatic book for him to devour.

The good thing, is I KNOW this.  I SEE it.  I can feel it.  And I am fighting.  I am not always fighting well though.  I am taking those vicious, beautiful lies he is feeding me and I am seeing truth in it.  However, I have called on God and you know what?  He is not taking this lying down.  He is sending people to pray for me.  He is sending people to fold socks with me.  He is sending people to say "Stop it.  I know this is hard, but you must fight how you must fight and lean on Him." 

Thank you Jesus for sending these people.  Thank you Jesus for your promise of a better day.  Thank you Jesus for taking up your sword and helping me defend.  Thank you for teaching me through trials even though I LOATHE the lesson, I have faith that the knowledge on the other side of it will be awesome.  The kind of awesome that only YOU can give.